Letter from Brian

HI EVERYONE,

Well, the baptisms are coming up this weekend and we are gearing up for that wonderful day. Isaiah and Marcalina are both excited as well and Marcalina asked Elder Jackson to baptize her and Isaiah asked me if I would baptize him. I thought that was really nice of him to ask me. He will be the first one that I have actually baptized on my mission. Although that isn't very important who does the baptizing, I think it is cool and he always calls me his missionary. I think that Isaiah is a really great kid as well as Marcalina but they are just really rambunctious (I think that is spelled that way) when they decide they want to be. We only have a few more commandments to teach them and it is just so great how impressionable their minds are at this age in their life. If you could pray for everything to go smoothly for the next few days that would be great.
It really sounds like it he been a trying week for most of the family and well it has been quite trying for me as well. I seem to have had an illness the past couple of days that is just pushing me over the edge. I can't seem to balance myself and I feel that I'm on the verge of a mental nervous breakdown and it just seems that everything is out of control. I personally think that it has very little to do with my companion's terrible actions lately and more to do with my wanting to love him and care for him and seeing my efforts go to a careless, belligerent companion who just wants to go home and mistreat women. I am actually surprised that he has not tried to take a swing at me but he has been very verbally abusive to me in front of members and other missionaries. It is hard and it hurts to see him that way but I still think he is a great guy but has many hurdles to overcome. I know that I have only about a week left and that it will be over with him and that is honestly the only thing that keeps me going along with reading my scriptures and praying for the strength to go forward with absolute faith.
I don't want to burden you all with a poor me statement but I know the Lord has something great in store for me. The Lord loves me so very much and I have learned that it is only those who can take the heat are the ones that he gives such daunting tasks to. I don't want to sound conceded but that is just something that I have learned. I know that he cares and just keeps us growing but we must either rise to the challenge or shrink and succumb to the Devil and wallow in misery. That WILL NOT be me I will rise to the challenge he has set before me.
Other than that things are going on fairly well and we are just striving for helping others come unto Christ. I've learned that even though the mission is truly one of the hardest things you will ever do, in the end it is one of the most rewarding experiences a young man or young woman could ever have in their life. I will treasure it forever.
So, I have discovered for myself that I am so much like Mom. Most things that I do remind me of things that Mom does and well I am absolutely happy that I am so much like her. There are things that I do that remind me of Dad and I just enjoy the opportunity of being able to discover that for myself, instead of everyone telling me. Well, I think that is really it for next week except I was wondering if you would guess what will happen to me next week seeing as transfers are then? I love you all very much and I hope that things are just continuing to look up and that the Lord may become integral in your up most thoughts and desires in life. Remember John 14:27 and I will write you in one week!

LOVE YOUR MISSIONARY
ELDER BRIAN BOWLER